Thursday, 8 November 2012

Dave Brailsford: Cycling Boss Implicated In 'Bungled Hits'.


There is no denying that Team Sky cycling boss Dave Brailsford has been under a lot of pressure recently with his 'sign or exit' no-doping policy at Sky, he has even been described as a 'hard man to please' and come under scrutiny for his numeric, often robotic approach to cycling - but in a dramatic twist it looks as though Brailsford may share more than just a passing likeness to 'Hitman' as his latest bungled attempt to keep Team Sky 'clean' demonstrates...

With the 'sign or exit' interviews complete and only Michael Barry and Bobby Julich heading for the door, it appears Brailsford has been angered by the lack of honesty. Brailford has maintained a calm air until now - he had most fooled that he was just 'a cycling coach', trying to do 'the best he could' for British cycling - but there is a sinister side to Brailsford that only now has become apparent. He is 'Hitman'.

There is clear evidence here, damning evidence in fact. With Bradley Wiggins hospitalised in a 'car accident' and only hours later Team GB and Sky head coach Shane Sutton suffering a similar fate it is obvious that these are the latest 'attempts' to rid Sky of any doping involvement. Had either 'hit' been successful we probably wouldn't be any the wiser but as Wiggins escaped with cuts and bruises and Sutton, thankfully diagnosed with non life-threatening bleeding and bruising of the brain, questions will surely be asked of Dave Brailsford (if that is his real name?) again. With a shambolic PR department, a failing black-opps unit will only add to Sky's woes.

British cycling hinted at the surprising and frankly unbelievable nature or recent events with the following statement:

"It is extremely rare that our riders and coaches are hurt while out cycling on the road, even rarer that two incidents should occur in a short space of time, and we wish Shane and Bradley a speedy recovery." 

We tried to obtain comments from Dave Brailsford but to no avail, unsurprisingly, and MI5 were 'unwilling' to discuss the situation. However we understand the 'order' may have come directly from Sky shareholder and shady underworld figure Rupert Murdoch - though nothing has yet been confirmed. No doubt the whole mess will be brushed under the carpet as 'a freak coincidence', perhaps Sky will simply deny any knowledge of Brailsfords murky past, though having used this one with Geert Leinders it's unlikely. Perhaps some other blatant and unbelievable excuse such as the 'accidents happen' line will be presented to the media but here at In The GC we will not have the wool pulled over our eyes this time.

The constant rumours from twitter that Brailsford is actually Lucifer himself may actually carry some weight after all. Whatever the truth - today is another dark day in the shadowy world of professional cycling, Lance Armstrong's systematic decade of doping is one thing, dodgy Dr's another, but hitmen working within WorldTour teams is a whole different kettle of fishies...

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